It’s not just pressure from the social group in which you rotate. Our brains unconsciously pick up signals from people around us and, based on them, shape our own behavior. And the consequences of this can be very serious.
Why we eat more in the company
“It’s no secret that the more you associate your identity with a group, the more of its values you share,” says Amber Gaffney, a social psychologist at Humboldt State University.
Students, for example, are more likely to be in favor of legalizing drugs and more active in supporting environmental protection than other social groups.
This is called social norms, and these norms are quite stable. However, as soon as at least one person in the group violates a norm, strange things start happening. Sometimes just one skeptical opinion from a friend is enough to change your behavior.
One study conducted among students at Humboldt University showed that people can radically change their opinions and behavior if other members of their social group behave hypocritically (i.e., say one thing and do something else).
In psychology, this phenomenon is called “indirect dissonance.”
“When you see someone behaving contrary to your views, you can also change them,” says Gaffney,“While I should be upset to see my friends behaving in a way that contradicts my views on certain issues, that’s not always the case. I won’t necessarily start copying their actions, but I can change my attitude towards them. After all, I consider myself part of this group, I consider these people important to me.” the researcher explains.
Several Australian studies on sunscreen use have also confirmed these findings. It turns out that under the influence of our environment, we can change our views even on issues that are extremely important for our health and life.
The dangers of sun exposure are well known, but the behavior of our friends can make us forget about the risks. The way we talk to our friends about healthy lifestyles can also influence our decisions, both positively and negatively.
“The main causes of premature death – smoking and obesity – are preventable, but we still smoke, overeat and don’t exercise,” says Christine Scholz of the University of Amsterdam.We are influenced by everything our friends do. Their mere presence can regulate our behavior: from prudent to reckless“.
Christine Scholz asked American college students to tell how they discussed their recent drinking with friends. If this experience was discussed as positive, the likelihood that they would drink again the next day was significantly higher, and vice versa.
Tricks of restaurant menus: how we are forced to order.
Every time we make a decision, we evaluate its value to us. Whether we take the stairs or the elevator depends on how much we ate for lunch, whether we went for a run today, and whether we are entering the building with a fellow triathlete.
Any action of the environment always depends on the context. That’s why our willpower often wavers. Your choice in favor of a particular dish in a restaurant may depend on other visitors.
“We are not always rational and often make decisions on the spur of the moment. Moreover, the importance of certain types of information changes throughout the day“, the expert adds.
Our choices are influenced by the presence of certain people, the time, any previous conversations, and our fundamental understanding of what is normal for this group of friends.
But if we are in doubt, the easiest way is to just look at what others are doing and follow their lead. “We do this all the time without even realizing it,” adds Scholz.
“A lot of research shows that when we dine with people who eat a lot, we eat more,” says Suzanne Higgs from the University of Birmingham, who studies the psychology of appetite.
People usually don’t realize that they are being affected by this kind of influence. They say that the food was simply delicious or the price was affordable, or they were just hungry.
This phenomenon was first described in the 1980s by John de Castro, who analyzed the food diaries of many people. The records contained detailed information about what, where, and with whom people ate. The researcher also analyzed how holiday dinners or weekends, alcohol consumption, and any other factors affected the amount of food eaten.
Higgs suggests that the presence of another person prevents us from listening to our own body signals. Other distractions, such as TV, also increase the amount of food you eat.
In the course of her research, Higgs also decided to find out how to promote people’s choices in favor of healthy eating.
“Unfortunately, the slogans about vegetables being healthy don’t help much…,” the researcher explains.
She went the other way and placed posters in the restaurant showing the most popular side dishes among the visitors. Higgs deliberately placed a vegetable garden in the first place.
“These posters described the behavior of other people, and that was enough,” she says.
When we get into a new environment, we look for clues from other people on how to behave. Information about what food is popular among other customers helps you make your own choice.
Interestingly, visitors were more likely to order vegetables even after the posters were removed. Higgs created a new norm.
“When we behave in accordance with norms, we feel good because we feel part of a social group,” says Higgs. – And if you are new to a certain group, you are more likely to imitate the behavior of others.”
Our decisions do not always depend on us. But we can use the influence of others for positive things. Just as the negative skills of others, which can be spread through a group of people, are sometimes passed on to us to model positive behavior. After all, we survived the evolutionary process precisely because we learned to live in a group. That’s why we tend to do good things and get the approval of others for it.
